[rant]
I’ve had a relatively easy pregnancy so far. I wouldn’t say
I’ve sailed through it without any discomfort – extreme exhaustion where I’m
useless past 4pm, and a six week long chest infection have been horrible, but overall I’ve had it pretty good.
I love my bump and I love feeling him moving around.
So I would really, really
like people to stop with all the “oh you just wait until…” comments.
I am fully aware that I will get more uncomfortable as this
pregnancy progresses. I am fully aware that there are going to be times when I
can’t sleep at 3am because he’s so active. I am fully aware that he could end
up in an awkward position where his movements will hurt me (foot under the ribs
is the one that keeps being mentioned).
You know what, though? I’m fed up of hearing it.
No, I’ve not had a baby before. No, this does not mean I’m
completely oblivious.
Generally, people aren’t saying this to be horrible, I know
that. I know they aren't genuinely telling me to stop enjoying the pregnancy but that's how it's starting to feel. I’m just so sick and tired of hearing that response any time I say that I’ve
been feeling him move and how much it makes me happy.
Would it honestly be so
terrible for people to think for a moment?
I have longed for years to know what it feels like to have
your baby moving inside you and now that I finally know what that is like, I
plan to damned well enjoy it.
Stop trying to make me feel like I shouldn’t.
My baby moving tells me that he is alive and well. This
makes me happy. If you think for even a second that this is something to be
taken for granted and laughed away with a faux-sage “poor naïve child, just you
wait…” then you need to have a serious rethink of your priorities.
I could be wrong but it feels to me whenever people are
responding in this way, that it’s more to remind me that they’ve had babies
before and I haven’t, than to genuinely give me advice or show interest in my
pregnancy.
On the other hand, you know what was a perfect response and
made me cry?
When I told my friend who has recently had twins (she had
also been struggling to conceive) that I could feel him moving, her response
was “isn’t it magical, being able to feel them there?”
Yes. Yes it is.
No, it won’t always feel magical. There are going to be
times it hurts, or is exhausting and stopping me sleeping.
But I am going to make a promise here and now that I will
never, NEVER wish that he would stop. No matter how uncomfortable it becomes.
No matter how naïve some of you experienced mothers will think I’m being. I’ve
always believed in ‘be careful what you wish for’ and there are thousands of
women out there who would give anything
to feel their baby move just one more time, even at 3am, even painfully.
I know that my thoughts don’t control what happens to my
baby, but I am so eternally grateful to have this opportunity to be a mum, that
I am not going to waste this pregnancy by wishing it away.
I can control my own thoughts. I will never stop being
grateful for this.
Movement will be uncomfortable, painful and tiring for me but you
know what? If it means my baby is ok, then so. Bloody well. Be it.
[/rant]
